Brooklyn Flea Gets Bursts At The Seamless 10/23 and 10/24

Ok maybe that was a terrible headline but don't blame me, I'm working on a Glenfiddich and feeling brave.

Let me give you the skinny on this kooky quirk: you have a lot of menus. You use the computer. You may even have one of those fancy iPhonez (I'm looking at you Szyzska). Why not trade in all that clutter for one all encompassing digital menu? Seamless Web, one of the oldest online food ordering services, is putting you to the test and turning your no-cooking into artistic gold, collecting menus from across New York and commissioning an artist to fashion something awesome out of it for the Brooklyn Flea next weekend (not this weekend, next weekend, I always say that for some reason as if I don't trust someone's ability to put my time frame in context). It's Less Paper, More Eat and below you'll find a nice schedule of where the Seamless Web truck is stopping so you can hand in your papers; it all starts on Monday (Oct. 18th, that's this coming Monday, not the Monday after).

As an additional incentive, if you've never ordered from them you can get 10 clams off your first ever attempt with the SW. Don't worry; all the menu items from your actual takeout menu are indeed on their menus.

Brooklyn Flea has had plenty of local restaurants set up shop to feed the hip masses but this stunt is probably the biggest I've heard in terms of actually taking advantage of Brooklyn's hippest. All I know is, whatever art Mr. Kevin O'Callaghan conjures up, is it safe to say it's going to be half Asian?

COME ON that was pretty good.

October 18^th – Union Square – 11:30am-7:30pm

October 19^th – Columbus Circle – 11:30am-7:30pm

October 20^th – Madison Square Park – 11:30am-7:30pm

October 21^st – Lexington Avenue between 57^th and 58^th Street – 11:30am-7:30pm

October 22^nd – Washington Square Park – 11:30am-7:30pm

October 23^rd – Brooklyn Flea (Fort Greene) – 10:00am – 5:00pm

October 24^th – Brooklyn Flea (One Hanson) – 10:00am – 5:00pm

For more information, visit www.seamlessweb.com/MoreEat.

Downtown (DoBrah) Brooklyn News: Cheap Pizza Hooray!

Photo from Downtown Brooklyn Facebook via Shop Downtown Brooklyn.

Yesterday was the grand opening of Gus Martuscell's Saporita Pizza near the corner of Smith Street and Livingston (on the stretch of Smith that goes north of Atlantic, you were almost fooled right?). Kings County president Marty "Farts" Markowitz was on hand to deliver the good news to Fulton Mall dwellers as well as occasional pizza lovers like myself who don't want to schlep to Lucali down on Henry or Vinny's.

Anywho, taking a look at their jawesome official website (Impact font was my favorite too guys) I see that they not only serve cheap slices during lunch (which I will never be around to partake in) but recession priced appetizers, pastas, and heros. When half the menu is averaging 6 bucks or less, you know you've hit the jackpot. When Markowitz is at your grand opening, you know he had a lot of work that day.

They also have a few specialty pizzas to rise them above the hole in the wall fray, including a Spicy Chicken pizza. Those who know me know that those two words put together is kind of like half an orgasm. Spicy Kuritza!!

You can check out their online coupons which makes this site even better. It should get a Webby Award. Three things that are probably coming soon: online ordering (so you don't have to talk to anyone), a Facebook page, and a Twitter profile. That's what I call using social media to harness your branding.

Before you get yourself in a tizzy, know that they are closed on Saturdays, probably because they are awesome (not for observing anything). And they are closing at 6pm, so nobody who lives in the area but doesn't work in the area is probably going to get to take advantage. It's like all the businesses in the area, you can only imagine...

The recent Visa commercial with Mambo Italiano is one of my favorite recent TV ads is below in tribute. The dude is spinning the pie and flouring it all snazzy, you know he's thinking "BOO YA":

Speaking of restaurants: I might have an actual restaurant down the block? GTFO

Photo by Brownstoner. Sign by restaurant.

Judging by all the shit that gets tossed around about Downtown Brooklyn, I'm surprised any life can be sprung from the mounds of figurative poop that suffocate this area.

Brownstoner is concerned that there won't be enough business huddling in this particular spot; I say if the food is good (also, depending on what the hell it is) I could probably eat enough to keep it afloat. If they have liquor it'd be a nice walk across the Metrotech and slightly less depressing than Harry O's. Hey, a Starbucks is doing just fine in the area. There's enough gullible college students that will want to do happy hour and then stumble onto the wrong stretch of Flatbush.

You can't really find this building; which can be a good thing and a bad thing. Bridgeview Tower has a terrible set of directions, so maybe I won't make it to this restaurant after all. I'm still psyched though. Maybe this is the real secret restaurant via can't-find-it.

Which reminds me, Mr. Bean and his shenanigans!

Secret Restaurant In Park Slope? Eh ra, not anymore bitches!

I don't like how the term "secret" used in conjunction with a bar or restaurant nowadays just kind of means trendy. Sure, people will say, hey, this is New York, if you don't like trendy, you can go elsewhere. I say fuck that. If something is written about in the local papers, it's no longer a secret. So when I see in Brownstoner that there is a secret restaurant behind Loki, I immediately think, LAMESAUCE.

For instance, when PDT first came out, I was like, this is awesome because you enter through a fake wall/phonebooth, not because it's a "secret" that got out. But the hype and idea of inaccessibility turned into trendy business is something that doesn't interest me that much. It doesn't do a business justice when labeled "secret", because that's just a label that high horse foodies and local media use to fill up their day. It's impossible to keep things secret in this city; the whole idea is to spill the beans about a secret place thereby destroying it's secrecy just to be the first person in your group of friends who has the honor of hyping something down the toilet.

So the "buzz" (why does that word suck so much) is that there's a new restaurant behind Loki. Park Slope doesn't really have the nooks and crannies to allow for real secrets. Follow that up with the fact that Loki is kind of a meh bar with no real character compared to their contemporaries in the area, you have something akin to impotency. I'm sure people disagree, but I say who cares?

In conclusion, I am in favor of of using the word "hidden" vs. the word "secret" when referring to an out-of-the-way place in the city, Brooklyn, Queens, whatever. Some random hole in the wall joint by an abandoned farm is a secret. These places are just hidden. Hidden also has a sense of urgency, like you should find it. It's a "find". It's almost more adventurous. Secrets that are by definition broken just makes it a oxymoron in a sense. Maybe I'm looking into this too much. Or, maybe I'm just pissed that I didn't find it first. But I'm not. Meh.

In tribute to useless trendiness, here's Soulja Boy's 'Girl You Stank Take A Bath'

New Arby's in Fulton Mall: stayin' classy with a side of roast beef

This is awesome. Brownstoner has extended its curiosity to the insides of the new Arby's at 372 Fulton Street in the Fulton Mall, and the results are decidedly more elegant than whatever is inside their sandwiches or subsequently your stomach.

Landmarked building you say? Put an Arby's in it. Just because it's a chain doesn't mean it can't be a time capsule, or hold the title of fanciest Arby's ever.

Photo courtesy of Brownstoner for more photos and some hilariously snarky comments such as:

"'You all sound like a bunch of communists.'

-11217

Sounding very 11209 today I see..."

go here.

Bar Spotlight (Football Edition): Harry O's

You can also read a similar review of mine on Yelp.

Harry O's

120 Lawrence Street (You don't think anything is on the block, but it's there)

Brooklyn, NY 11201

Harry O's is neatly (or not neatly) tucked away on a construction filled block of Lawrence (and stands to make lots of business if the new building across the street becomes inhabited, as the new tallest building in Brooklyn). It's definitely a bar to look out for in the next few years or so if it keeps around; the building across the street at 111 Lawrence will be a huge addition to Downtown Brooklyn's already boom-attempting bid for residential supremacy in the near future. However, with it's height, so much for the views from our roof! Being so close to me that when I first looked for it I couldn't find it because I didn't think it was that close, I walked in on a Sunday afternoon to watch the games. There were several regulars in the spacious bar area, and the restaurant section is actually rather large, decorated very simply and old school, everything wood, white linen tablecloths, well lit, like something out of Bay Ridge or more suburban upstate. I sat down at the bar and enjoyed a 3 dollar Yuengling and some cheap, really good chicken fingers (although I was hoping for some good sauces). The menu? Whatever was written on the chalkboard sign. The cook? Was the barback, which is awesome because he was just chillin' like a villain with the other patrons. The bartender was very sweet, she was being celebrity roasted by Hatch, a good natured (although I freaked him out about a dream I had about Troy Polamalu) Redskins fan that was big enough to play linebacker for them. I guess they were good with each other from a while back. There was a Steelers couple to my left, and two older gentlemen came in later and starting cursing about jobs, honor, and friendship. The jukebox every once in a while popped on a Sinatra tune which was kind of weird. All the games were on right in front of me, it was quiet (save Hatch's grilling), and incredibly chill. While it doesn't have the overall warm vibe that Cody's has, it's super relaxed and definitely hidden to most. The funniest thing? Hatch must have had a late night the night before, because he totally fell asleep at the bar at around 4:25 in the pm. The place was so chill that everyone just let him take a nap for about 20 and he went back to watching the games as if nothing happened. Bottom line, if you're looking for a bar that is a little out of the way (unless you're a DoBro denizen) to relax and watch the games with limited menus and a couple of characters, Harry O's could be your spot.

You can see the location here, take any train 'cept the N or D and you're kosher.

Eat It Brooklyn goes camping....

Peekytoe Crab Beignets. Gotta love hot balls filled with crabs.
Photo by Eat It: The Brooklyn Food Blog

The lovely Eat It: The Brooklyn Food Blog has yet another culinary greatness to report on over in Park Slope. I'm always looking for a nice seafood restaurant (Red Lobster totally counts, sorry folks but those cheddar biscuits rule and since they aren't in my neck of the woods I'll settle bitches).

Traversing the Brooklyn Fish Camp on 5th Avenue, here's what she had to say:

"When I asked my Mom the other night what she wanted for dinner, she said, "A salad and a nice piece of fish", so naturally we headed to Brooklyn Fish Camp, (165 5th Avenue, between Douglass & Degraw Streets, 718-783-3264), the BK outpost of Manhattan's Mary's Fish Camp. I'd actually never been there, but was pleasantly surprised and have now added it to the long roster of great Brooklyn restaurants. We were seated in the little backyard courtyard at one of the long communal tables. There were a few red, white & rose wines by the glass, a handful of beer on tap (we got a Pilsner and an IPA that were delicious - Victory and Greenflash), and a selection of specials as well."

"For our entree, my BF & I shared the Grilled Daurade Filet with Yellow Wax Beans,
Cannellini Beans and Radishes. There were two big pieces of fish that was meaty and slightly oily, brightened up by the beans & radishes. It was a satisfying and delicious dish."

For more photos of the meal and general uncensored food arousal, check out Eat It 3 times a week. I do like Victory Pilsner, especially when feeling full at The Spotted Pig on a Sunday afternoon.

New President Means New Excuse to Party - Dekalb Ave. Inaugural Celebration Jan. 16th to the 20th

I love good deals on assorted merchandise and alcoholic beverages. Since it'll be cold as shit this weekend, why not stay local and get your butt to Dekalb Avenue in Fort Greene (from Ashland to Vanderbilt), where Barack Obama = discounts and even free stuff all along the way to the White House. This starts tomorrow and ends on the night of inauguration on the 20th, which I'm sure will start the constant headache in Obama's head and possibly see some conception action with several couples in the neighborhood.

Oh and this "event" (more like week-long binge) is happening on Facebook here. Not that anyone is counting, but show love anyway and pretentiously tell people that you'll be there like I did.

You really don't want to miss some of these deals, there's two for 1 drink specials, affordable restaurant prix fixes, discounts on merchandise, and on the night of the inauguration, places to watch history happen for the forty-something'th time. There are 29 businesses participating, and the full list (with locations and their specials) can be seen at this link here. It's a PDF, so your computer will undoubtably slow for a second.

I have an idea where my Saturday afternoon into evening will be spent, and then walk home easily schnockered.

From the Facebook invite:

"FORT GREENE'S DEKALB AVENUE MERCHANTS CELEBRATE HISTORIC
INAUGURATION WITH PROMOTIONS ALL WEEKEND LONG
Obama-inspired special menus, drinks, discounts and other offers.
Friday, January 16-Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Brooklyn, NY-January 8, 2009 Twenty-eight restaurants, cafes, boutiques and retail
stores of the Dekalb Avenue Merchants' Association in Fort Greene, (a Brooklyn
neighborhood long known for its multi-cultural diversity) invite you to "Celebrate the
Inauguration on Dekalb" and continue the electrifying celebration that began in the streets
on election night and continues right through Inauguration Weekend, Friday, January 16-
Tuesday, January 20, 2009.

Participating Dekalb Avenue businesses will be offering discounts, coupons, reduced-
price prix-fixe menus, drink specials, vouchers for discounts on return visits or 2-for-1
specials all weekend long. Plus on the day of the Inauguration, locations with big screen
TVs will be opening early to broadcast the ceremony and will have live music, DJs and even
more specials throughout the day.

The list of participating merchants and their offers include... 20% discounts to celebrate
the 20th of January, 2009... 44% discounts to celebrate the Inauguration of our 44th
President... special menu creations reflecting President-elect Obama's multi-cultural
background... plus coupons, vouchers and other special offers.

ALSO: "Obama" posters created by students at Dekalb Avenue's Ronald Edmonds Learning
Center, Middle School 113, will be exhibited in windows up and down Dekalb during the
celebration weekend. Come see the work of these young artists who have been so
profoundly inspired. Plus students from the school's Academy of Performing Arts Choir
and Band will be performing at select locations on Inauguration Day.

This event re-launches the Dekalb Avenue Merchants' Association (DAM). The Association
covers Dekalb Avenue from Washington Avenue to Ashland Place, plus businesses on
intersecting side streets. The association is about businesses working together on issues
of mutual interest, connecting with the community and promoting this vibrant strip in the
heart of one of Brooklyn's great neighborhoods."

I Need To Get My Ass Here

Curiously walking by Morton's which, opening recently by the Marriott, seeming to have a whiff of duplication, I wouldn't say chain, because well, it's a bit fancier than that, but being by the hotel I kind of pinned it as a neat little trap for those staying near there.

Not so fast says The Brooklyn Paper. Incredibly not so fast, as they purport that Morton's eclipses the mighty Peter Luger's. Since I'm close by, I repeat, I Need To Get My Ass here.

Then I realized paying 85 bucks for a steak with my appetite might not be too prudent at the moment. I could always drink at the bar and watch others eat.